The Last Ride of 2014. New Year's Eve.

Mountain Bike Ride.

The Pensioner

New Year's Eve route

A poor turnout for the ultimate excursion of 2014, just me and The Pensioner to be exact, gearing up in a rapidly filling Lordstones car park. Don’t you just hate it when all the day people are off at the same time? To make matters worse last orders in the cafe was at 2pm, owing to a private function, something probably involving footballers wives and pristine Range Rovers,  The Pensioner opined contemptuously, which meant our ride would have to be either fast or short, I’ll leave you to guess which it was.

A cold day with the odd icy patch until we turned off road onto the track up the side of Carlton Bank, partially thawed snow had refrozen, rendering the whole track smooth as glass and slippier than car salesman on commission. Strike one to the winter, we pushed to the top where it wasn't too different, except for a narrow strip to the edges of the track which was rideable with care for the able bodied and fully sighted. The Pensioner, whose inability to keep his front wheel in a straight line at the best of times is well known, found it all somewhat ‘challenging to say the least’ but as the saying goes he is still lapping the bloke on the couch.  On top of the moor, after Barker’s Ridge, the full force of the wind hit us, the bitterly cold wind, a quick rethink of the route soon saw escape routes being utilised and after a quick banana stop at Cock Howe (yes we still snigger, although not as much as at Bell End) we made our way down Trennet Bank in a slithery, sliding fashion which owed as much to winter sport as it did to cycling.

From the road at Chop Gate, we stuck to tarmac all the way back to Lordstones, employing some caution on the steeper bits of road which seemed to have escaped the attention of the gritting lorries. Soon we were in the warmth of the packed cafe, two men, on the verge of middle-age, splattered with mud, in wet Lycra tights and stinking sweaty tops, amongst the holiday strollers and ladies who lunch. Did we get some funny looks? Oh yes.