The Start Of Another Year.

Mountain Bike Ride

The Youth, The Nissan Nomads: Ian, Keith, Charlie, Gary, Ryan.

4th January route.

The second ride of the year turned out to be the same as the first ride of the year, which was yesterday, because I checked out the route in advance so our buddies from the Northern land of Nissania could avoid as much mud as possible in another introduction to Guisborough Woods and the surrounding area. Only The Youth was available/could be arsed/could tear himself work* (*delete as appropriate) but we were joined by a fearless five who had managed to escape the production line for a day on the moors. Seven riders, it’s a long time since we could muster that much enthusiasm from the Terra Trailblazers. After happy new years and introductions, we left the car park and pedalled past Pinchinthorpe Visitor Centre, through swarms of kids and dogs, I think today is the last day of the school holidays, which means everything will be back to normal next week. Call me a grinch if you want but the sooner the better for me, all that christmas crap back in the loft where it belongs. 

The unavoidable hardship of Guisborough Woods is the start, to get to the good stuff, it is climb after climb, as Cyndi Lauper might have sang if she’d ever been cycling in North Yorkshire - once she’d got her breath back, mainly fire road, meandering upward through the forest for a couple of miles, after which, our route took us past the bottom of the SOW track and up onto Roseberry Common. One last push (literally) and we made it onto Newton Moor and things levelled out somewhat. Roseberry Topping looked as though there was someone on top giving out free ice cream, a steady procession of people trudging up the zig zags despite the grey weather, standing on the summit ‘plateau’ like penguins on a shrinking ice floe. We headed in the opposite direction and soon arrived at one of Guisborough’s other attractions, The Unsuitables, luckily at the top, our Geordie accented peloton continued up and down Percy Cross Rigg, away from the fire roads and onto rocks and mud, not the sloppy, wheel-sucking, soul-destroying goo we’re used to at this time of year but nicely firm mud. Bonus. The downhill gave the younger ones a chance to get their bikes in the air, obviously saving rubber by using every available kicker. A quick regroup at the gate before heading around the Lonsdale Bowl to Fingerbender Bank, so called after one of The Pensioner’s unfortunate accidents, this proved to be the highlight of the ride so far, the Nissanians coming back through the wardrobe and enjoying the technical challenge of ruts, drop offs and loose rocks. A short bit of flat riding took us to Andy’s Track, which was named to annoy The Pensioner because he claimed, frequently, vehemently and with maximum profanity, to have discovered it. It is a steep drop down the hillside above Gribdale Gate, only accessible when the bracken is down, during summer it is impossible but today it was a grand bit of fun. 

Captain Cook’s Monument was our next objective and in the spirit of our mutual acquaintances, the Sierra Cycling guides, just a ten minute climb, to those guys, every climb is ten minutes, whether it’s half an hour, four hours, just ten minutes. There were some valiant attempts but nobody reached the monument without resorting to pedestrianism, the short flight of steps round the war memorial being the usual nemesis. We had a breather and took in the view, such as it was, some vague hilly shapes barely seen through a grey haze but it was dry and not even too cold - we’ve had worse starts to a year. A steep track took us down the south west flank of Easby Moor, where we encountered our first dose of North Yorkshire mud, on the bridleway between Mill Bank Woods and Easby Wood, luckily it is a brief section and we were soon poised above local test-piece the Red Run, which seems to be getting steeper. There were a couple of non-runners (me amongst them) but everyone else gave it a go. 

Fun over for a while, we climbed back up to Roseberry Common via Great Ayton’s answer to Lesbos, Dikes Lane and then through the farmyard at Hairy Arse Farm, going back into Guisborough Woods to find some of the less-muddy off-piste tracks. The short climb to the Hanging Stone trail was a test for weary legs but everyone livened up on the rooty trail, The Youth failed to repeat his previous performance on the steps, when he flew down them without his bike like a capeless Superman. Another track followed, downward through the trees but pleasantly so, none of the signature eighty five degree slopes the Guisborough Trail fairies are famous for. ‘One last climb.’ took us to Les’s Three, which was enjoyed by all, particularly when Gary fell into the water filled ditch at the bottom, which I missed because I was bringing up the rear. For one last bit of fun, we finished down the cow field at Hutton Village, giving the youngsters a chance to show their air skills on the grassy drops to the gate. 

After threading our way through the whirling maelstrom of kids and canines around the visitor centre and found some seats in the cafe for a spot of calorie replenishment and made plans for further adventures. We said our goodbyes in the car park and the lads disappeared back through the wardrobe to Nissania, back to the production line, churning out Geordie Japanese jalopies for the masses and dreaming of spending their wages on new mountain bikes.