Spring Is In The Air

Spring Is In The Air

No wind, no rain? It’s not natural.

Scaling Dam

Monday 2nd March 2020

The Breadlad, Oz.

No wind, no rain, as Diana Ross once sang, although she probably wasn’t singing about Scaling Dam car park but it was the same here, after a squally February, it felt as though spring is about to put in an appearance. The song lyric continues with ain’t no mountain high enough, if she ever trudged for two hours up a Lake District fell with a bike on her back, she might change her mind on that one too. Remarkably pleasant weather to begin March with however and almost a crew out today, well, three of us anyway. We enjoyed a fairly standard ride, High Tranmire,The Slagbag, Green Houses, Underpark Farm, Lealholm. 

A few miles of tarmac took us to Houlsyke, then the climb to Danby Beacon via the rocky track up Oakley Side, it looks as though there has been a torrent or two of water down here recently, wet, loose gravel soon became our reason for resorting to pedestrianism, that and my worn out drive train which balks at steep hills nowadays. A mere eight months of riding has left the front chain ring looking like a ninja death star, the chain slacker than The Ginger One’s morals and the rear cassette is as worn out as The Breadlad’s passport. I was hoping to get the winter out of it but it is not to be. From Danby Beacon we returned on the superb track over Roxby Moor, today a bit of a muddy mess for the first half mile or so, before it firms up and gives us an awesome blast through the heather, Scaling reservoir glinting blue in the sunlight, leading the eye to the distant North Sea. Shortly afterwards, we are back in the car park, burger in one hand, coffee in the other - life doesn’t get much better, or maybe we are just easily pleased.

Sharpening The Skills

Hamsterley

Wednesday 4th March 2020

La Mujerita

A few miles around Hamsterley with La Mujerita, sharpening up her trail skills and there is a definite improvement, less hesitation and a less falling off. The troublesome dangling foot still appears from time to time but that could easily be cured with a set of old-fashioned cages pedals, although the chances of her clipping her feet to the pedals are about as remote as beating Danny Hart down his own Descend track. A steady ride along the Gruffalo Trail and the Grove Link served as a warm up before we plodded up to the green box rest stop just beyond Accelerator. We had a couple of laps around the bottom section of Transmission and a couple of laps around Accelerator, where we met The Ginger One having a lonely slog up the fire road, heading for Polties Last Blast, the start of a superlative quintet of trails, twisting and turning to the valley bottom. We headed back along the road to the Skills Loop, where one of us enjoyed a play on the see saw before attempts were made on some of the skills features, all with a lot less procrastination than last time we were here. 

Shaun The Sheep and The Quakers

Birk Brow

Thursday 5th March 2020

The Ginger One

Dragged the old 29’er Stumpjumper out today while the other bike went in to have some life-saving surgery, a new drive train, equivalent to a human heart and lung transplant. If I could get the same I might be going through a drivetrain every four months instead of every eight. Me and The Ginger One met at Birk Brow, a lofty car park popular with lorry drivers (for the butty van) and pensioners who sit in their cars brew in hand, staring mournfully through the windscreen at the world passing them by, Plato’s Allegory Of The Cave in the 21st century. Although the weather is pleasant, once again, the ground is still sodden, so we took tarmac to the Shaun The Sheep bus shelter before venturing off road along Robin Hood’s Butts, some improved drainage has downgraded this track from canal to deep puddles but we stuck with it all the way to the Danby road. 

We descended the partially paved Pannierman’s Causeway to Clitherbeck Farm, then the gravel bridleway to the road above Oakley Side. The stoney track we climbed so laboriously on Monday became a much speedier descent although loose rocks and ruts made the possibility of a face full of bush loom large, and spiky bush too. We made it down unscathed, The Ginger One’s movie star looks intact, still looking like a male model, a male model fronting a campaign urging women not to leave their drinks unattended. 

A quick blast through Danby and Danby Park brought us to the Castleton road and the interminable climb back to Shaun The Sheep, The Ginger One feeling the pace of two days in a row - he’s nowhere near ready for retirement, two days in a row is merely a warm up for us retirees and a life without call outs would never suit him. Eventually we reached the Quaker’s Causeway, scourge of hardtail riders and soft-arse pedallers throughout the north. Some people view the causeway as sensible and speedy way across an otherwise boggy and difficult moor, when I say some people, it seems to be only me; the remainder embark on it with the enthusiasm of a visit to Dr. Hoop, North Tees hospital’s banana-fingered proctologist. Ten buttock-battering minutes later we were indulging in burgers of dubious provenance for the second time this week and enjoying every bite. They say cycling aids weight loss - not the way we do it.

The Pensioner Would Have Been Proud

Great Ayton

Friday 6th March 2020

Alone

It seems I have exhausted my supply of riding companions, in more ways than one and they’ve all scurried off back to the hamster wheel of employment while one of us heads out for the fourth time this week. On another fine day, spring might be round the corner and I’m on the old bike because number one bike is still in surgery and things are not looking good for the old bike either. The three way switch and rebound knob on the rear shock looked a little bit loose and kind of sloppy, so, remembering my many years as a process operator, I had a good fiddle about with it, in preparation for the “process tap”, which as the name suggests, involves a heavy object coming into contact with an inoperable object until it either works or becomes utterly dysfunctional and a problem for the maintenance department. 

My little knob never even made it that far, as it dropped off in my hand, bathing my fingers in oil. Pushing it back in didn’t work; the shock had not lost any air, so the ride continued. How hard could it be to ride a bike with no shock damping? Answer, it depends on your susceptibility to motion sickness. Every turn of the pedals came with it’s own bob, especially on tarmac. Rocky, rooty trails became akin to saying the wrong name mid-coitus, then hanging on while the steed attempts to eject you. After finding rock beats hip in this peculiar game of paper, stone, scissors, the ride became a tour of the fire roads of Guisborough Woods - The Pensioner would have been proud, his type of ride, light and airy, wide tracks, no trees to collide with, no vision impairing darkness, just miles and miles of uphill and down dale. It was a grand day for it though, the sun beamed and the wind was light, back in Great Ayton the coffee was warm and the butcher is still open for delightful concoctions of pastry wrapped meat - pedalling intensely equals satisfaction, or pies for short.